So, have you missed me?

It has been a while since I have written a column. It has been busy, oh so busy. And for someone like me, that means reverting back to bad habits.

To say I was bad would be an understatement.

But I am back on track. Actually, I am taking some reader advice. In response to my last column regarding snacks, a reader suggested substituting carrots for chocolate or whatever I am craving.

I did that last week with carrots and celery. Nice and crunchy like a chip and they work well with hummus.

Breakfast is always a challenge. The last month, the easiest thing to do was stop at McDonald’s and grab a sausage egg biscuit.

That isn’t helping me.

I would go with just grapefruit or fruit salad, but bloggers remind me that I need more than just fruit, which is of course, just sugar.

No pleasing anyone, huh?

So this week, as I worked to get back on track, I turned to oatmeal and fruit. I get a grain and I get natural sugars.

It holds me through lunchtime and doesn’t make me feel cranky or icky. Actually, I have a little energy.

Portion sizes will always be a problem for me. But I am looking at it closely, again. I opted to buy a sourdough sandwich bread just because the slices are smaller and for two pieces I get 140 calories. The whole wheat sandwich bread has pretty big slices and two slices cost me 220 calories.

Food Junkie Discovery

I like hummus. But the other day I discovered it was pretty low-calorie (50 calories per two-tablespoon serving). That isn’t bad and it is a great way to dress up celery.

Eating better is essentially about planning and making trade-offs throughout the day.

Shocking news, right?

Don’t discount reinforcement.

I was reminded of that recently when Mr. X was working in the Medford area for a week (well, except St. Patrick’s Day; he came home so I we could celebrate with a stout).

As I went about planning my meals, I took into consideration what I was having at each meal time and what type of snacks I would eat.

I knew early that at some point I was going to have beer, burger and fries. That meant breakfast and lunch needed to be reasonable — no Taco Bell or bagels.

So, breakfast was a nice bowl of cereal and low-fat milk. Lunch was barbecued chicken wings (taken off the bone) and tabouli. I went for simple snacks: bananas and grapes.

Practice makes habits. Come Thursday, I was thinking about every meal. Breakfast was a nice treat: Sausage egg biscuit. Lunch, well it was more of a challenge since I didn’t pack it. But I knew I wanted tuna noodle casserole, since I was craving old favorites that could be eaten over a couple of days. I didn’t want to have a lunch that was really packed with calories and carbs, if I was going to have noodles with cheesy veggies and tuna for dinner.

The choice was clear: Pre-packaged salad. It had 14 grams of carb and 280 calories (that included the cheese, corn, lettuce, chicken, salsa ranch dressing and corn chip strips).

It is one of those things that make me go “Duh.” It is simple. It is not a new concept. And it may be a critical key to eating better.

Food Junkie Discovery

Bread is a hard thing to give up. I really like French, Italian and sourdoughs. To make matters worse, I really like grilled cheese sandwiches with soup. This generally means two pieces of bread and two slices of cheese. Not always super figure-friendly. The other day I just wanted a grilled cheese sandwich, but didn’t want all the calories. I had a loaf of roasted garlic sourdough. I cut a slice, put some butter (heart-healthy butter substitute) and topped it with feta cheese. Toasting it makes the feta soft and it spreads nicely on the toast. It was a very satisfying grilled cheese and I only wanted the one piece.

If you asked me my favorite food, I would probably stumble because I haven’t found many foods I don’t like.

But if you really pressed me for an answer, I would say anything sweet. Cookies, I like them. Cake, I say yay! Ice cream, double scoop, please. OK, three scoops.

I admit it. I’m a sweet-a-holic. So much so, that when I started my adventure to eat better and lose weight, I looked for fat-free, low calorie and sugar-free ice cream treats. I really like ice cream.

There are some good choices out there for dieters. And I tried a lot of them thinking it was my salvation — you know, that secret key to keeping to a diet and eating right.

It just fed my desire for sweets. And the occasional Blizzard or “real” dessert or ice cream treat would just trigger more cravings for the non-diet items.

And that just makes this adventure more of a roller coaster. While I like adventure, I’m not a big fan of roller coasters.

So this Lenten season, I have decided to try to break the addiction — or at least get better control of it.

I am giving up sweets for 40 days (Lent runs from Ash Wednesday, Feb. 17, through Easter, April 4).

But I have found a couple of tricks to deal with strong cravings, depending on how strong the desire is on a particular day.

On really bad days, I try to eat a nut mix that might have a few chocolate bites. There is a specific mix that has dark chocolate-covered soy nuts. A handful of nuts with a few those chocolate jewels and I’m better. It is like quitting smoking and using a nicotine patch or gum. Just a little bit.

On the average days, I try to feed the craving with naturally sweet things. I have really increased the amount of fruit I eat. Strawberries and grapes are great since they are easy to eat while I read, cook and work. Apples and oranges are a nice way to finish lunch instead of having a candy bar or pudding cup.

Ice cream has always been a very special for me. It is sweet, creamy and cool. So when I really want an ice cream treat, I turn to yogurt and yogurt-based smoothies. When I want strawberry ice cream, I eat low-cal strawberry yogurt or a smoothie.

So far, it is working. The only time I ate cake was on my husband’s birthday. Even then, I only had one piece of chocolate cake and I didn’t want seconds.

Food Junkie Discovery

We recently tried buffalo (bison) meat in tacos and burgers at home. I have heard that it is better for you, though I am still investigating this. It is good, and when you make burgers, it doesn’t shrink as much as ground beef, which means there is less fat.

There are days I am very glad I’m not back home in Tulsa, Okla., because my mom and dad are still shoveling snow.

While we haven’t had lots and lots of snow, winter around here has brought lots of rain. As of Thursday, we were at 14.99 inches for the year. It’s hard to motivate myself to get out and walk on those rainy days. I just want to sleep, which doesn’t help me with my weight-loss and fitness goals.

Lately, however, I have noticed that bright yellow-orange orb peaking out and some blue skies. Ah, happy sunshine. How I have missed thee!

First, this means spring is almost here. Spring marks the start of farmers markets in April and May. More importantly, there will be a better selection of fresh fruits and vegetables.

I feel that when there is a better selection of fresh produce available, I have a better chance of staying on track and eating well. Last year, I had green beans two or three times a month. I even found a tastier way to prepare them then just throwing them in the pot and boiling them. (I cooked them in skillet with butter and garlic)

Second, getting back to sunshine, can translate into more walks along the beach or along local trails. On a recent sunny Saturday, I recruited a friend to take a nice stimulating and very long walk with me along the road in Bullards State Park.

Trust me, I feel rusty and a walk in the sun makes me feel new.

There is a third reason I like spring, at least this year. Spring marks the end of my graduate program. Starting in March, I am in my last seminar, which is focused on writing my Capstone paper (thesis). In June, I graduate and will have a master’s degree in military history.

And that means a good night’s rest so I can focus on being a good foodie.

Food Junkie Discovery

I don’t have a food or an exercise to tell you about, but I do know of news coming down the pike. Meghan Walsh, one of The World’s reporters and my exercise buddy, will start a new blog about exercising — the Workout Warrior: Fighting for fitness. I can’t say when the Workout Warrior is going live but it is coming.

Film director Kevin Smith is a big guy and his size got him booted off a Southwestern Airlines flight. The airplane servants thought he was too heavy — even though he could fasten his seat belt, even though he could put down the armrests, meeting the airline’s own criteria.

His removal has stirred up a bit of debate, especially as Smith, who is also known for his character role Silent Bob from films like “Dogma,” has issued a string of irritated Tweets.

I felt bad for Smith. He admits he is fat, but his weight really isn’t a safety concern on flights. He didn’t deserve the boot.

Booting “Bob,” frankly, makes me mad because it makes me feel that society looks down on those of us who are heavy — those of us who don’t fit into the ideal picture of health and size.

What is worse than Smith’s rejection was the discussion that followed. CNN’s “Anderson Cooper 360” did a segment about the Smith Incident. It included panelists vocalizing on both sides of the argument. An at-home audience asked if the airlines should simply add larger seats for passengers who are fat. One panelist Peggy Howell, who represented the National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance, liked the idea. She even said one group of interior designers had developed redesigned airplane layouts that included larger seats

OK, cool. I could live with larger seats.

But then this advocate for National Activists Against Obesity, Meme Roth, said that other passengers and airlines shouldn’t subsidize a lifestyle choice.

Lifestyle choice! Seriously?

I just couldn’t believe that someone who is trying to make the world healthier would say something like that. It isn’t like I decided to take illegal drugs or be devoted to only my religion.

I started looking at her Web site. It focuses on food and efforts to ban junk food. And from her TV talk I got the feeling she just blamed people for having bad eating habits and food choices. I keep thinking she believes fat people just sit on their butts and shovel food in their mouths all day.

As someone who struggles with weight, I know that food and habits have a big role in my being overweight. But it’s not just a lifestyle choice for everyone.

Some people have glandular and metabolism problems. Some people eat because of mental health issues. Right or wrong, it’s how they deal with fear, loneliness, depression — or to simply cope.

I don’t know a single fat person who just sits at the table and eats. I know even though I don’t always make the best choices, I still try. Just about every heavy-set person I know tries to eat healthier.

It can be agonizing.

We don’t choose to be fat. We don’t get up in the morning and say “I’m going to eat my weight in McDonald food today.”

We know we are heavy because we have made some bad choices, because of what was easy, available or even cheap. We aren’t happy about it, which incidentally leads some us (including myself) to eat more. Food is a crutch. It makes us feel better. Food is an enemy. It rules our lives.

Being thin isn’t as easy as banning junk food from schools or making transfats illegal. After all, fruit is full of sugar, too. Should I stop eating fruit?

I know activists like Meme mean well as they target the obesity epidemic. But they don’t get it. They want to label it a lifestyle choice without fully understanding why some of us eat. Why some of us are fat. Why some of us spend every minute thinking about what we are going to eat and what people are thinking as they see us eat.

No, Meme, it isn’t a choice. It’s a daily battle.

A blogger recently suggested that it was time for me to get serious about my weight loss.

What?! was my first reaction. “I think about food every single minute of every day … how am I not serious?!” But then I read the entire post and she was making a lot of sense. The biggest suggestion she had for me was to plan. She wasn’t the only one. I have received other comments about packing a lunch and having a meal plan for the week. That plan can serve as the shopping list.

Good ideas. Good ideas. But … but … OK, I don’t have a but this week. I could make an excuse about time, and not having enough. While that is true, maybe better planning would fit my time constraints.

Take a recent Tuesday. Mr. X was traveling for his job, so it was just me and the two generals (our cats — Gen. George Patton and Gen. Ike Eisenhower).

In these situations, I generally opt to make something that will last a few days. This time I had cooked a roast with sweet potatoes, carrots and onions on Sunday. By Tuesday, I was down to just meat and really wanted to have roast and brown rice.

Well, Tuesdays are a busy schoolwork night since a mini essay is due by 11:55 p.m. I was running dreadfully behind and by 7 p.m. was still not in a spot to start writing. It was also time for dinner. At this point, there was no time to stop and cook rice. Yeah, I was already stressed and decided I was ordering delivery pizza.

While it was veggie pizza, I wasn’t happy because I wanted roast but just wasn’t prepared with a plan B in case time got short.

The following Wednesday, I developed a plan B by stocking the freezer with some figure-friendly frozen dinners.

Now for this week, well, Mr. X will be home and I think I will plan meals out for the week and then go grocery shopping.

Food Junkie Discovery

I was reminded this week that support systems are critical to success in just about everything we do in life. Personally, I have Mr. X, Amanda and Meghan. Each one of them is always very understanding when I constantly fall off the wagon.

And there are number of different groups that meet to help individuals in their weight loss efforts.

• Overeaters Anonymous — 4-5 p.m., Mondays, lower-level meeting room, Lower Umpqua Hospital, 600 Ranch Road, Reedsport. (1-541-271-2436)
• TOPS OR No. 300 — 9:30-10:30 a.m., Tuesdays, First Christian Church, 2420 Sherman Ave., North Bend. (541-756-4481)
• TOPS No. 114, North Bend — 6 p.m., Tuesdays, Church of Christ, 2761 Broadway, North Bend. (541-267-2965, 541-266-0547)
• TOPS No. 1135 — 9:45 a.m., Wednesdays, Madison Street Community Church, 417 Madison St., Coos Bay. (541-269-5488)
• Weight Loss Challenge, 6 p.m., All About Wellness Center, 400 Virginia Ave., Suite 205 (Kyle Building) North Bend. (541-267-7900)
• Overeaters Anonymous — 7-8 p.m. Thursdays, Reedsport United Presbyterian Church, 2360 Longwood Drive, Reedsport. (1-541-662-0973)

Stress eating.

Yup, that is how I would sum up the last couple of weeks after an abnormal pap smear resulted in some minor outpatient surgery.

Don’t worry. Everything is fine. But food became a central part of dealing with the situation.

Let me see: The day the doctor told me I required surgery, I decided that a buffalo burger and sweet potato fries were in order. Monday before surgery it was a combination of cheeseburger, garlic fries and a blizzard treat. The night before surgery — when you think fear would make me not hungry — I ate pasta with a fattening and scrumptious alfredo sauce.

I’ll be honest. The food was just OK. It didn’t make me feel less jittery nor did it make me feel guilty for eating it.

This time around, I realized my stressed-fueled eating binges weren’t about having food comfort me. It was about control.

I couldn’t control what was going to happen with my body. I couldn’t prevent the need for surgery or control the outcome of the test that made my pap smear abnormal.

What I could control in this situation was what I ate and how much I ate. So when I wanted a burger that was what I was going to have. No one could tell me no. Soda, ice cream, every French fry on the plate … each item was under my command.

Not the healthiest way to approach food, but that is the thing with stress eating, it is about the control.

The best lesson I can take away from all of this? Well, if I am eating to feel in control, then this is the opportunity to let that control dictate good decisions: Eat the orange instead of the ice cream, pick buffalo instead of ground beef, eat a salad instead of fries.

Control can, and should, lead to better decisions.

Food Junkie Discovery

I don’t really have a discovery this week. One of my goals is to eat more fruit. Right now, I am really enjoying the oranges that local stores have on special. That is the great thing about this time of the year. Some of the fruit is re-emerging, making it a little easier to find good quality.

I really thought that starting my efforts again this month would be so much easier than when I started in May.

It would be easier because I had already shed some pounds, found an exercise buddy and felt generally inspired to eat right.

So, would someone please explain why this is twice as hard as it was in May?

I have really struggled with not eating too much. It doesn’t matter if it is good for me or not so great for my efforts. I just keep putting food in my mouth. Snacks are a great example. At home, I have healthy snacks: Carrots, nuts, pickles and cheese. What do I do when I get home: I have a healthy snack. I feel proud of myself … then I manage to eat a sample of every snack I have.

OK, this past week I did a little better, but it is something I constantly struggle with and I’m always looking for a way to nip it in the bud.

And if me having food-in-mouth syndrome wasn’t bad enough, I read that the nutritional information on restaurant and some frozen foods isn’t correct. In some cases, the calories actually in the food is double what is listed.

This is problematic since I really rely on the restaurant nutritional information.

Sigh.

It is OK. This just means I have to be more cautious about the foods I pick and realize there may be more calories in it than I think. More importantly, I just need to watch my serving sizes.

Even though it has been a rough go, I do have some good news. I have really done well at keeping Goal No. 2: Eat more fruit. I have had a piece of fruit every day and it really has cut down on my desire for sweet treats. Though I will admit, I did have a handcrafted peanut butter cup from a local candy shop recently — but it was a rare treat.

Sometimes I do feel like a nut — or three

I try to stay away from naming too many brands, but in this case it might be hard. Recently, I stumbled across Planter’s Nut-trition selections. These nuts are geared for different nutritional/health needs.

There is an energy mix and healthy heart mix. More importantly, there is a diet mix that is cashews, almonds and macadamias. It was handy to find a nut mix with the nuts that I want.

So after a full week of the new year, I decided that resolutions may not be the best idea.

A resolution is just too easy to ignore because it never feels like it means anything. It is just a statement that is frequently unrealistic.

This year, I am going to write specific goals that are achievable.

No. 1: Lose 20 to 30 pounds. I’m still about 13 to 15 pounds (depending on which day I pick to get on the scale) from my original goal of 30 pounds. Even if I reached that goal, I still think I may be too heavy.

Goal No. 2: Eat more fruit. Local stores are carrying more and more oranges, and I love oranges. Don’t worry, I like a lot of different fruits but the good ol’ orange is a good place to start. Part of this goal is to eat at least one piece of fruit a day.

Ideally, I hope to take a blogger’s advice and move away from candies, cookies and what not — you know the sugary stuff that I love so much. I think increasing my fruit intake may be the right step to take. And I am already doing it — I had an orange after deadline!

Goal No. 3: Eat more whole grain breads, rice and pastas. It is hard to eat a balanced meal without grains. They are kind of necessary. But I don’t have to eat sourdough for every sandwich or enriched, bleached flour pasta. There are better choices. I just have to eat more of them. As for rice, while I love sticky white rice, I know brown rice is the better choice and it isn’t all that bad.

Goal No. 4: Exercise more. I have been slacking on this point since Thanksgiving, really. I need to do some sort of physical activity at least twice a week. There are walks to take and exercises to do.

Hopefully, goal numbers two through four will help me reach the No. 1 goal.

Food Junkie Discovery

Chicken strips. OK, I know what you are thinking but I’m not talking about breaded chicken strips you eat with a dollop of barbecue sauce. I recently found frozen grilled chicken strips. This gem saves a time when I want a little bit of chicken but don’t have the time to bake, blacken or roast chicken.